What I see right before exams

Well, its exam time, and I realize quite a number of things suddenly while trying to have group study sessions with these people. Some of the minor things I realize are funny, others very annoying whether for me or others. Some things I actually don't really like happening is when people start going out of track. Well, whoever is reading this, if U have studied with me in a session and u still think that i dont realize, ur wrong. I always realize whenever the group goes out of track, but I choose not to always correct it because I understand that we need breaks. Especially the case for law. Not everybody has the same attention span, therefore I give minor breaks in between to relax a bit. I know that I could have stopped and forced everybody to focus, but what's the point when people feel tired and out of focus?

However, I need to point out the fact that I also have my own deadlines to meet. Everytime I start a session, I already have a target in mind. And I always strive to hit the target. Ur playfulness/attentiveness will determine whether I can hit this target or having to spend more time wasting my breath. Do you people really think its really that fun to raise my volume above average for an extended period of time? Actually it feels like singing karaoke without a mike. I only enjoy the fact that I am the centre of attraction and furthermore when its for a good reason. Sometimes people say I talk a lot, but actually that's only a very small part of what's going on in my mind. I like to analyze and will cease every chance I can to think of what is actually going on and how am I going to deal with it. I know I may not be the genius who has an IQ of 200, or can think 100 steps ahead, but I also know that I'm not ur ordinary guy. I plan things in my head. I analyze people's intention,  people's character. I come up with goals to hit. Most of the time I dont really hit these targets. Mainly because I couldn't muster myself to do what I have planned to do, whether because it seemed to silly or it seemed too extreme. No matter what happens, I value relationships between people more than anything. I understand that relationships take a hard and long process to create and fortify and can shatter easily. If I start avoiding people, there must be something seriously wrong, whether its ur attitude or just that we dont click. But I am and will always stay on the side who takes initiative. I try to get to know people, and understand whether they are the type that I would like to mix with. If yes, I would try further. Some people don't like mixing with me. I know I have my own flaws, nobody is perfect anyways. I only give it my best and wait for the rest.

Anyways, this is a very long blogpost about myself. I express certain feelings when I feel like letting it out, not because of anybody. So to whoever I might have mentioned, I mean no offence.